Annie is the name of my first ever girlfriend. We met my sophomore year of high school. I had a math class with another girl in their “group” and had met Annie through her.
Annie wasn’t completely “out” and I wasn’t “out” at all. I remember always feeling differently towards girls than what I did with guys. I was “one of the guys”. I even would “check out” girls with the rest of them when in middle school. I thought it was normal until the names started coming. So I tried to ignore the feelings.
Once I had met Annie and the rest of the people she hung out with. I finally started to feel a little better about me liking girls. However, the names kept coming. We all started hanging out every Friday at a local coffee shop.
My brothers found out way before my parents did and they were fine with it. They even think it’s cool. I guess it’s some weird guy thing. I didn’t plan on telling my parents until I was absolutely sure that I liked girls. I didn’t even know if I was gay or bi at the time either. However, my mom found an online blog that one of the girls in our group had and read it on one of the Fridays that I was out for coffee. She was extremely upset about it. I don’t know if she told my dad or not. It’s never really came up though.
Almost 4 years later and my mom still thinks that it’s just a phase that I am going through. She talks about me when she thinks I’m not listening. My dad doesn’t talk about it since there is no need to. I’m not the first person in the family to say they like the same sex. My dad’s cousin is openly gay and is really close to the family. . My brothers are still cool with me being confused as to whether I’m gay or bi. Even my cousin loves to take me out to the store to “check out” girls. Most importantly, I’m not in the closet anymore about whether or not I like girls and my confidence has improved since coming out.
I’m not absolutly certain if I’m gay or bi but I hate labels and I know that I like girls… Just not sure about the guy thing.

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